18 for 2018 – Inspired by Gretchen Rubino

I have a few books written by Gretchen Reuben, 1 was purchased on my kindle and the other in Toronto Airport when we were awaiting our flight back to Glasgow after being home. I love what she does and says, her Podcasts are so inspiring but the main thing is that they are easy to understand and incorporate into your life without really thinking about it too much but that the results are really life changing.

I’m not so much into New Year resolutions because I think that if you want to make change, it should be an ongoing process and not waiting for the 1st of January to do it. If you really have something in life that you want to do, if you can put all of your effort into it, I do believe that it is well within your reach. If you set your mind to something whether it be small to someone but of major significance to you, the end result will be empowering and with empowerment comes achievement, yes?

So what is this thing that I am banging on about? Its Gretchin’s 18 for 2018 and its all about achieving 18 things throughout the year that mean something to you and has a positive impact on your life. The 18 things can be anything and it an take as long as it takes, but within the next 12 months… I don’t think that 18 thing are really hat difficult and it may mean writing another list but I’ll concentrate on my first and see how I get on.

When thinking about this, I wanted to make small achievable goals because this isn’t about adding more stress to an already stressful existence! Its something that I can do and think or write about whenever and wherever… Something to be proud of and something that will impact me and possibly others around me. So where do I start? Well….

I read something on social media this week which was quite powerful and made me think a lot about certain situations that I have found myself in very recently.

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/a6/02/91/a60291d461dad32d6cb0f3d178331338--happenings-positive-thoughts.jpg

So this is one of the things that I want to really concentrate on in 2018.. I am very hot headed and I generally react by shouting and getting angry. In order for me to stop reacting in an angry matter, I need to step back, think about all aspects , who is involved, impact of my anger and breathe.

Breathing is the key to all life.

A lot of this first goal is about my daughter and some stuff that she is going through. She lost her Nanna very suddenly and she is currently going through the “anger” part of the grieving process but through this we also think that there may be something a bit more underlying.When she gets angry, I react in the same way, we say things that we regret , the tears flow and there is a constant atmosphere which is affecting everyone here and even the dog. So I must learn to breathe first and react second. It’s very hard.

2. Walking at least 5 miles a day. This was something that I was achieving before Christmas but after having a small operation 3 weeks ago, that stopped and I can see how much it has impacted my moods and my eating habits. The dog is also suffering because she was really enjoying her long walks and now she is only getting out to the park across the street and smaller walks. That’s not fair. I also want to get my daughter into this with me so I guess there is two parts to this goal! I think it will help improve her moods and her fitness.

3. I want to use my gym membership more and go to at least 2 early morning classes a week. I love getting up before everyone, getting my workout done and be back in time to get the kids off to nursery and school and then the dog walked. I feel I get much more done on these days and although I am all for self care and looking after yourself, my own mental health is better when I am organized.

4. Concentrate on growing my business. I love what I do and I have a good client base but I feel like I need to be more organised and reign in a lot of things as my head is a scatty mess. I need to re design leaflets, find out exactly which therapies out of all of the ones that I do, are my favorite ones and just do them. I know that aromatherapy is one at the top of my list as is pregnancy and when I do these, I get lost in them. I am also dabbling with making stuff with the oils but that can come at a later date.

5. Making time for friends. This can be done in different ways as we all have such different lifestyles, work schedules, and demands. I am going to diarise dates with those who are able to do so and make an effort to even catch up with others via skype or facetime – this is generally for friends an family on the other side of the world.

6. Paying off at least 2 of my credit cards by the summer. This is achievable because I can do overtime when the kids are sleeping or by using my other income as a Complementary Therapist. I would like to say that I am lucky to have these two outlets but to be fair, I trained and studied and all of that was achieved via hard wor. The over time think is lucky but again, I am qualified enough to have a job where over time is available and that’s down to my own skills that I learned and invested in. The other skill that I have is blogging and although I have only just picked it up gain after a long break, I know that I can be consistent and pick up the ol sponsored post if I want to. I can also make some money via selling things on eBay and I started just before Christmas, the money went towards a credit card and in one week with combining all the above apart from massage, I put £65 towards a card. How good is that?

7. Entering Competitions .. its become a new hobby that I picked up on my quest to save money and become debt free. I was also inspired by a film that I watched which was a true story. Now, please note that I am under no illusion hat I will win very much and that’s ok. Like I say, its a hobby 🙂 Its simply a hobby and its something that is distracting for me after the kids have gone to bed.

8. Not accepting the negative behaviors of others , this kind of ties in with number 1 . Something happened over the Christmas holidays and it was quite hurtful to me although those involved probably didn’t even know that it had such an impact.. I don’t want to go into it and I have made adjustments to how interaction will be from now on. There was one other situation where I felt that someone in my life was always contacting me when they needed to vent. At first I was angry as I wasn’t being asked what was going on with me and my family but then I thought , well maybe I am a source of comfort and advice? This is quite empowering that I can help in a situation which is upsetting for another person and that they trust me enough to confide in? Yes! this is it! ( To ther person that this is about, you know I’m not attacking you with sharing this and no names are mentioned. I am here for you always).

9. Being more present, accountable, be there more to listen to my husband, this kids, friends.. I don’t know that this makes sense or does and that I have no reason to explain?

10. Using my summerhouse more for meditation, relation, yoga, mindfulness for both me and my daughter and maybe redesign it and make it even more welcoming. A sanctuary of light and love? I remember before I ordered it that I wanted it to feel as though it wasn’t just in my back garden but I could transport myself into that secluded forest somewhere far away.. a place of complete relaxation…

11. Stop and count my blessings.. stop thinking “if only I had more money, I could do this”  or “I wish we had a bigger house” etc etc. stop making it about “stuff” maybe reading more bout minimalism? I have much goodness in my life… and I mean things like fantastic friends, a good paying job, a roof over my head, fantastic family, we don’t go hungry and have food available. I have self…. an awareness. It’s the “stuff” that gets in the way. I know I said that I was comping but it’s just a fun thing and a hobby. I don’t care if I win or don’t win. Its all a bonus.

12. More family time. I need to make sure that we have more quality time from watching a film together , walks, cycling, museum. Something that is focused on us spending time without arguing! I have worked weekends for a while now as well as Christmas and new year , all holidays due to the nature of my job. Because of that,we ind it hard to spend time as a family without arguing because we have different parenting skills. This causes confusion for the kids and it all erupts like a volcano which isn’t good for any of us.

13. Home.. I want to go home this year… Home is Canada and with me paying off credit cards, it can’t be the top of my priority list as it defeats the purpose! So comping it is! If I could win a trip home, it would be a bonus but if I don’t, there is always next year.

So that’s it for now.. I will update my list on my next blog post.. the next 5 are going to be ones that I really want to think about.. maybe something like “read a book” or catch up on my pinterest board, see that film i have been meaning to for  months.. ?

Are you writing an 18 for 2018 list ? If so, please do share as its inspiring to read how other people are living their lives, their motivations and what they hope to achieve. Thanks for reading.

Progress!

I’m still plodding along but not following plan as it was causing me a wee bit of stress. I am going back to it but not for a few more weeks because I’m currently writing from my hospital bed, getting ready for a procedure.

Up to this point, apart from my birthday week celebrations and a wk after that, I was doing very well. My fitness has improved so much and my fitness goals are being smashed! I’m thinking more about lifting and I have a few ideas of what I want this year to be like with weights being a huge part of my regime. I love how I feel after doing them and how my body is changing. I’m also very lucky that I have such an amazing trainer who knows what he’s doing and guiding me properly in technique.

I don’t know if anyone has followed Instagram account Planking for Pizza or size 22 guru, but if you’re on your weight loss and fitness journey, I’d highly recommend both. They are motivating and inspiring not to mention absolutely hilarious and strong. I watch their stories every day and am amazed by all that they have achieved and continue to achieve. One of the biggest things for me is that they are real. They eat real food and they also have treats… no restrictions. How good is that?! They know that real life is about things which can and do crop up, they don’t say no but they plan for things such as nights out or other social activities or just wanting to have some shit food from time to time. This is why they don’t fail. They are accountable and they are sensible but they work damn hard too.

I think that when we set goals for ourselves, we also start a process of restriction which can lead to falling off the wagon. I didn’t want to use the word failure there because that’s such a negative thing to say and when trying to lose weight, you just don’t need shit words and connotations. I think the whole 80/20 rule is right, that we should also never see foods as good vs bad… that in itself can lead to disordered eating in my opinion and I’ve been in that place when I was younger… it isn’t pretty and you’re worth more than that.

So this wk as we approach Christmas, I plan on walking more if my body will let me since I’m still in a bit of pain, more water and more fibre and protein in my diet. Small goals which add up to achieving.

Diet Chef:Final Week!

Well everyone, I have completed 4 weeks of Diet Chef and I’m sorry that this post is a whole week late due to the eldest child starting back at school and us going back to a routine.. I have my results!

If you remember, I had wanted to lose 4lbs in my final week and was really going crazy with the exercise .. However, this didn’t go to plan and I lost 1lb and 1 inch from my thighs and I think approx 1 inch from my bust as well. Talk about happy! I couldn’t be more delighted at that weight/inch loss. Its amazing for me to be 1 lb off of a stone loss because although I have been working so hard to achieve,  I was a bit skeptical at the start as I just felt that it was  just”TOO EASY”. The proof though is in my results and I will keep on achieving.. I have now gained the understanding about portion control and cutting out alcohol during the week.

I have to say that Diet Chef really has made me sit up and face what was looking back at me in the mirror.. challenge the denial and take responsibility. I didn’t have to worry about going hungry, I could plan my week better and I even found time to relax more in the evening because I didn’t need to pre plan what I was taking to work and as I said in a previous post it made getting the dinners for the rest of the family, even easier.

My experience with Diet Chef has been a positive one and I would thoroughly recommend buying from them because you will lose weight if you follow the plan, and you’ll feel fantastic too. I never felt that I was on a diet because it wasn’t, it was healthy eating and portion control with amazingly yuummy meals.  I challenge you to try it! My next challenge will be to lose another stone for Christmas as I have been motivated and I’d even say that I am on a high. When my daugter went back to school last week, some of the parents that I hadn’t seen this summer, had noticed my weight loss. That is a great feeling.

 

*Thank you to Diet Chef for allowing me to have a 1 month free trial. All opinions are based on my experience and I have not been paid to say anything other than how I felt and what I experienced.

Life Changing Events?

I wrote a little about little and big changes that I wanted to make to my life this year and you can read about the most major of things that I have so far completed, here

I am still on some sort of journey and although I haven’t really been blogging much,  I have been very busy helping a friend with her business and also putting my ideas into practice, I am still on the train of self discovery and change. This past year has truly been amazing but so very busy. Bubblebutt has turned 1 already and I have also returned to work after maternity leave, which in itself was a period of adjustment but I am happy to say that all is well in the world of work.

I set myself some personal tasks , one which is really going to test me physically as well as mentally.. I am unsure if I will be able to complete this task but I will try as hard as I can to do so. The event in questions is “Tough Mudder 2014”. I was supposed to be doing this with a friend but I am unsure as to whether or not she will be able to do this due to work commitments, and our conflicting work schedules.

However, I have a great trainer in @GymguyMark who not only pushes me to my limits at the Western tennis club physically but also believes that I can do this. I think he might be the only person who  actually does believe that I can do it, whilst everyone else thinks I’m crazy. Is it really that nuts to push yourself , to achieve and do something out of your comfort zone? I wouldn’t have thought so but I feel that there are a lot of people with negative attitudes around me at the moment and I just want to scream when I hear their doubts and tell them to stop objecting and start believing.

I think that this post may turn into something of a rant.. I see a lot of people “talk”  about the changes that they want to make and I know that change can be unnerving and scary but I hate hearing the same moans and groans about how life isn’t going the way that they want it to go.  Get out there, grab life by the balls and DO something!  Even if its a little thing but do it because you want to do it, do it because it makes YOU happy, not anyone else and most importantly , ENJOY it!

I am a bit prone to procrastinating when it comes to tasks that I have to complete on a daily basis but if you get all of the “niggly” things done and out of the way, spend less energy on complaining… There really is more time for doing the things that you enjoy. I realised this very much so today.. I have been far more productive and less complacent and the amount of things that I have completed has amazed me. I feel good for it and I feel less stressed despite how I was feeling this morning knowing that there was stuff that I had been putting off for weeks. I feel good for writing again, even if its just a lot of nonsense … I forgot how good it makes me feel 🙂

 

 

 

Why I’m Not Setting New Years Resolutions for 2013

Ok, call me a cynic, a stick in the mud, a grump , gobshite or anything else but I have my reasons. Really.

Whilst everyone sets their resolutions, I will not be part of this for a few reasons.. I have no time to sit down and self criticise myself, I’ve spent the last 30 years doing that and I don’t need to mess up months of CBT to look at things that involve picking myself apart, the bad parts and well, criticism! Why do we do it to ourselves, use negative ways of thinking which only draws us deeper into downward spirals for some?

Yes it’s nice to start the new year off a fresh but if we really wanted to pay our mortgage off in a year, lose a dress size, but a new house etc, we wouldn’t need to wait until the 1st of January to do so! Think about the psychology behind it and the saying “why put off tomorrow what we can do today”? Also statistically we are setting ourselves up for failure! Think about it, in terms of dieting. People will join slimming world or weight watchers with the best of intentions and a lot will lose weight but I’ve seen it more times that the weight will go back on which then starts the process of beating ones self up… Are we secretly into S&M? We do these things to ourselves and end up feeling worse.

I’m not saying don’t set goals, without goals life wouldn’t be proactive and positive but set them realistically and don’t wait until the 1st of January to do it! Just look at things from different perspectives and don’t bite off more than you can chew:)

I do have things that I want to do this year such as complete some of the Pinterest ideas that I have posted to my on line boards but because they make me happy, and they make me smile and I won’t beat myself up if I don’t do them. Also, I want to get back in to running as it helps my own mental health and something that I have done on and off for years and I haven’t been able to do it through this pregnancy, or budgeting as I really do enjoy saving money and teaching myself new skills. I don’t class these things that I want to do as “shoulds”etc

The difference is that I am not giving myself a time limit, I feel that it takes away the joy of the experience and adds stress which personally, that’s not something I need any more of in my life because in a matter of weeks I will have enough of that with the expansion of our family.

For the first time in a long time, I’m doing things which I enjoy and don’t put expectations on to myself cause I just don’t see the fun in that. Each to their own, I’m not judging those of you who are setting resolutions, we all liv life differently and I wish those of you the best of luck! Here’s to an exciting year ahead!

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