Be Myself?

Ive gone and done something that I never thought I would do… I joined the Parent Council. I know, absolutely off my head and nuts.. Me? I am not parent council material!!! I don’t do authority , happy clappy ,blah blah blah stuff, it just isn’t me! So why did I join, I hear you ask? Well I have to say that having kids has mellowed me somewhat in my old age. I participated in the family fun night a few weeks ago and I got to know more parents and it was just really nice to see people show up with their kids and well, HAVE FUN.

However, I have a problem… I pinned a board on Pinterest for fundraising ideas and it has a link to this blog. My child goes to a catholic school and my language has as those of you who read this, been a bit sweary at times and my blog is about bearing my soul to the world. Do I take the link off or do I stop worrying and just stop thinking that people will judge me and my views? I know that if the shoe was on the other foot and someone said to me that they were in this predicament, I would say “shut up , don’t be ashamed”…. Am I feeling shame? Why?

I guess its being in a new situation with people that I will come face to face with on a daily basis and I kind of feel that I am the one “back in school”… However, I am proud of what I have achieved and I guess if people do want to talk, let them. Says more about them than it does me. I have had a lot of encouragement over the years in writing this blog, I have helped people and I love writing . Guess its really a “no brainer”…

My main reason for joining the parent council is to boost school spirit and plan events for the children, whilst creating a sense of community which I feel is lacking in this area. IS that a bad thing? Wouldn’t have thought so at all. I guess with any new situation inn life, where you are putting yourself out there, that we all feel a bit vulnerable at times… I guess I have found my answer..

Talking about Being Gay To Our Child

Today Thunderpants and I went to the fort this afternoon and on our way home as we were listening to her CD-Justin Bieber(I know, you don’t have to say it), she asked me how her Daddy and I became boyfriend and girlfriend as well as asking how he and I agreed to have a baby and get married.

I told her how we had met when I was working at the Odeon(RIP) on Reinfield street when I was a student and that her Uncle B was my boss and had introduced us etc. I also said that we had gotten pregnant before her and that we lost that baby which made us realise how much we had wanted to be parents and that she was made from that decision and of course out of love.After a bottle of cava…

She then said to me “what about if I don’t get a husband”? I said, well that’s OK cause not everyone gets married or you may get a wife. She said “Like the ladies at the museum”? and I said “Yes”. We had gone to Kelvingrove Museum at Christmas and there is an exhibit celebrating same sex marriage and this had obviously stuck in her mind. I think if she is old enough to ask questions that she is old enough to get an answer. Also, I have a lot of friends who are gay/bi etc and I see no reason for her not to know, its just as much part of life as being heterosexual.

Her father though, asked me “We should consider the school that she is at” (a Catholic school ), I don’t believe that we should because A) I am a recovering catholic and B) they don’t consider the thousands of people that they have shunned, offended etc. I know he is thinking of her, he also doesn’t see peoples sexuality as an issue(as it shouldn’t be) but it still did bother me.

I know some parents are going to wonder why I explained this as she is only 5, I got the same reaction when I posted about being honest when it came time to discuss suicide but it is my choice and right , as a parent to do this. I feel a child who knows the truth, will be more informed and more accepting of things in society which have stigma attached to it. She already knows that i had PND and although she may not completely know what mental ill health is, I’m always around if she wants to talk about it.

How do you all deal as parents, with issues which are considered “taboo”? Would be interested in hearing!

Driving and Mobiles :Childcare Provider Caught Driving On Phone

I have had to contact our local police station due to the irresponsibility of a local childcare provider allowing their member of staff who I know is a manager and has been cautioned before,to still get behind the wheel of a mini bus and transport children to their schools. Also, this person speeds and double parks each morning at my daughters school , with no apology when she boxes you in and is consistently getting the children to school late.

I am struggling with the fact that the police have said that the person in question has to be caught doing it before they can have a word with her, which I can understand to an extent but not to the extent where she could have a direct impact on my own daughter and her safety, as well as my own as I was behind her on one occasion as she went up the icy hill and on another occasion I was driving towards her.

What goes through someones mind , its bad enough doing it when you are driving yourself and doing it but to put the safety of kids  that aren’t even your own and without their parents knowledge is absolute madness! When you put the trust into someone else to transport and care for your children in to someone else, you expect a certain level of  professionalism and  common sense to follow. It is putting their fate in to someone else’s hands, and for this reason it has clouded my judgement when it comes to  possibly using any other services when new baby arrives.

Did I do the right thing? have you done this before? I believe that I have done the right thing and I also wonder if a campaign should be started to change the law before someone gets hurt or even dies?

Damn Christmas Spirit!

Ok, So in the day that I have been away from Facebook and Twitter, I have looked through Pinterest! Bloody hell, I’m replacing one addiction for another. Not really, I assure you and I promise. Thunderpants and I were looking on the Christmas section because our annual Christmas BBQ is coming up where we have our friends over and their kids, a bonfire in the back garden and food prepared. Last year we put a projector up, and showed Home alone, Elf and a few other Christmas movies for kids and the adults.I fucking love Christmas.

As we were browsing for ideas, both for cooking, crafts and decoration ideas I came across a “Random Thoughts of Kindness” Pin board and website (http://tsjphotography.com/blog/random-acts-of-christmas-kindness-summary/) … Where you can do things like put extra change in a parking meter , things like that and it started me thinking about our street and how there isn’t that much in the way of community spirit for one reason or another. Then the idea dawned on me…. with the help of a friend and I am awaiting her call…. What if her and I made up a little package which wouldn’t cost anything to make, or a note to put on someone’s window of car with encouraging words and just try to brighten up someone’s day?

I know what you’re thinking shes a “goody goody” etc why would you do that? , Well for those who do read my blog, you know I’m a sarcastic bitch, am bat shit crazy,I’m the least likely to do something like this..I moan and complain about everything and rant.. ALOT. I agree that it is a crazy idea blah blah blah BUT, someone might be having a bad day, feeling lonely, not have many around them, people could just need some cheering up. I am not religious, I am not doing it for any personal gain, I don’t want people to know its me (well why blog about it?) I am blogging cause people around here won’t know of my blog and therefore they won’t connect it to me 🙂 There is one person in particular who I want to write a letter to who doesn’t live on my street or in my community but lives near my husbands parents. I know she’s had an incredibly difficult time raising kids who unfortunately are drug users, and despite everything that she has gone through, she smiles and takes the time to ask how you’re doing. I don’t want to divulge too much as that wouldn’t be fair but this woman deserves to know that she is amazing. So maybe there will be an extension to the local community.

I am so excited about it and I really hope that it doesn’t sounds nuts (so hope they don’t feel that they are being stalked neither), this could be one of my most fucked up ideas to date but I want to do it, I am thankful for the family and friends that I have and although not assuming that the people on my street don’t have that too, its just nice to know that it could make someone smile especially as Christmas can be a difficult time of year for some. I will update on what ideas we come up with and I will try and post some pics too

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What do y’all think? Crazy or not so crazy?

Liz Jones

Hi Liz

 

I doubt that you will come across this post let alone read it but I wanted to say how I felt about the article that you posted yesterday in the Daily Mail. I am not a fan of the paper for a number of reasons which I have touched on previously and really, there is no need to revisit as any right minded and intelligent person can see it for what it is. Something to wipe ones arse with if you’ve run out of toilet roll but be careful cause it does burn, or in fact on that thought , use it for a bonfire .. shit does burn after all.

Anyway, back to my point. I read another of your articles to see if it was the norm to write like you had then, the way that you did yesterday. Of course I am talking about your writings about the Mumsnet event surrounding blogging. Whilst we all have our own opinions, freedom of speech etc I see that you tried to ridicule other mothers who turned their hand to writing about experiences which affected them in every day life with their families.  is it because their writing styles were very good and you felt threatened, inadequate? What you need to learn is that we are not all trying to steal the lime light but look for an outlet to share our experiences, to know that others are possibly going through the same things in life and also for some its comfort. You see the thing is, my blog started out about my own experience with Post Natal depression an the difficulties that I went through when Thunderpantswas born. It was therapeutic and it was a place where I felt that I wasn’t judged for how I felt and the thoughts that were going through my head.  I could talk about wanting to leave my daughter at the hospital, about the time I shook her bed out of fear and frustration, thoughts of killing myself,running away etc.  Writing my blog helped me get better and to realize the illness for what it was and it empowered me to know that I was able to get through things, and then go on to help other women. it helped me be part of an amazing film funded by the NHS and Anti Stigma Partnership here in Glasgow to raise awareness for other mothers and  fathers. Is that bad? Is it wrong to want to and to have helped other parents?

I don’t pretend or believe that i am anything special , I have many spelling  mistakes and my grammar is ridiculous but I am real. I am a person , I am a mother, wife,friend,sister (albeit to the bitches of Eastwick), an employee, a volunteer for rape crisis, a student, there is more depth than you will ever be aware of and I will write until the cows come home, I won’t be put off by your article.  As we are all responsible for how we feel and take things, I am choosing now to treat your article like water off a ducks back, as many others have. I feel for those though who maybe aren’t and that you have offended.  I just wish though that I could understand why you were so mean to those women who treated you nicely and welcomed you in to the event.

I draw your attention to something you had said in an article that you wrote, “Spouting filth’s a VERY strange way to stick up for free speech”, and the things that you said in the article. Its quite ironic, don’t you think?  You talked about what if you were at a particularly low ebb? what about the women you have offended? Do you know what they were experiencing in life? I wouldn’t have thought so. You have contradicted yourself many times and yes, it may have got more people talking and discussing you, is that really how you want to be known? I’m a big believer in karma but I am an even bigger believer in trying to understand why someone would be so vile.  People usually react in ways such as that when they are full of anger and resentment… maybe have a look at some of the mental health blogs (many valuable and informative ones out there), it could help in dealing with your feelings of anger and help you write more productively.

 

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